Learning how to Bounce! Resiliency : What is it? Why it matters.

 

 

 

Michael H Ballard Canada

Resiliency is starting to gather more attention. Personal resilience helps us stay healthier, do better in school, have happier relationships, experience more joy  and do better in our jobs. Family resilience also offers that and makes for better neighbours and safer communities. Resilience in the workplace helps with staff engagement and retention. The benefits of creating, having and nurturing a personal, family, organizational and community culture of resilience is very valuable.

But, what is it? Resilience is our ability to “bounce back” from adversity. Life’s BIGStuff events that we all have happen to us eventually. Death in the family, loss of a job, divorce, poor performance at work or school, chronic illness, having your house burn down you get the picture.

Resiliency is a set of key factors we can all use to assist us stay safer and move forward and often create more successful outcomes.  There are two major parts to Resiliency. Inner and outer resilience. Inner resilience includes the beliefs you hold to be true,  your problem solving skills, and the goals you’ve set for yourself. Outer resilience includes the values of the community you live in, teams you’ve built around yourself, the education you have, the support you have from family to name just  a few.

So how do we get more? Well to further develop and deepen our inner resiliency a key place to start includes: –  Our self control. Moderation is a very powerful factor in being resilient. Our resistance to temptation, our restraint to over doing things is a great place to start. Key skills to help us manage our inner world include: Diaphragm Breathing and Meditative Walking.  More on this in a future column.

To further develop our outer resiliency developing and deepening trusting relationships with people who treat us with respect, sharing time with others that have high expectations of us and them of us are powerful places to help us deepen and widen our ability to thrive. Setting boundaries and expectations with others politely and clearly make a difference.

Resiliency is a life long process. A key to me is that we have to set boundaries and  expectations of our self and with others.  Being resilient offers up life as a life long adventure.  It helps us stretch into life’s BIGStuff moments and issues keeping us safer and happier and often offering us much better outcomes.

So until next time, Imagine Yourself with more Resiliency for Life.




What is blood cancer? The symptoms and treatment you need to know

 

Blood cancer is the fifth most common type of cancer and third biggest cancer killer in the UK, yet it can still often go undiagnosed when patients visit their doctors with the initial symptoms. Sky Sports presenter Simon Thomas is now campaigning to raise awareness of the disease following the death of his wife Gemma, who passed away just four days after she was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukaemia in November.

Sharing a tweet from cancer charity Bloodwise, Simon told his followers: “Acute Myeloid Leukaemia took my wife Gemma and Ethan’s mum just before Christmas aged only 40 years and just three days after being diagnosed. This is so important.” He added: “Three times my wife Gemma went to the doctor in six days and three times she was sent home and told to rest. Four days after her final visit to her GP she was dead. We have to help and train our GP’s and to detect #bloodcancer earlier. @bloodwise_uk is doing this. #hiddencancer.”

What is blood cancer?

Blood cancer happens when something goes wrong with the development of your blood cells. This stops them working properly and may prevent your blood from doing what it normally does to keep you healthy, like fighting off infections or helping to repair your body.

What are the symptoms of blood cancer?

Each specific type of blood cancer will have different symptoms, but there are lots of common symptoms such as:

  • Extreme tiredness
  • Repeated infections
  • Unexplained weight loss
  • Easy bruising and/or bleeding
  • Drenching night sweats
  • Itchy skin
  • Lumps or swelling in your neck, head, groin or stomach
  • Bone and/or joint pain

How is blood cancer diagnosed?

Many blood cancer symptoms are shared with illnesses like colds and flu – for example tiredness, fever or an infection. Lumps are a common symptom of lymphoma, but other, less serious illnesses also cause lumps. Because of this, see your doctor if you have symptoms or groups of symptoms that you think are unusual for you, or last for longer than normal.

The most common types of tests for blood cancer are blood tests and biopsies, but the tests you have will depend on your symptoms and what type of blood cancer is suspected.

What is the treatment for blood cancer?

The treatment you receive will depend on the type of blood cancer you have, but may include chemotherapy, stem cell transplant or taking drugs that encourage your immune system to fight cancerous cells.

This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice. Visit your GP with any questions you have regarding a medical condition.




An Uplifting Guide to Stop Boob Sag!

As we get older and our age heads north, other things head south. Bums get bigger and flabbier, our muffin top tends to start spilling over our jeans and, a real problem for women, boobs begin to sag. No matter where you end up in the cleavage spectrum, be it the slender bee-stings of a Kiera Knightley or the voluptuous, round mammaries of a Kim Kardashian, in the end only cosmetic surgery or the world’s best Wonderbra can stop the slide.

Or is that the case? If you can afford it, silicone supplements to boost your bust can be an answer but if not, there are more fun, and possibly a bit extreme (if less effective) ways for ladies out there to ensure nipples are staring in front rather than at the floor.

  1. Tie balloons to your boobs

Balloons on your balloons? It sounds weird but still possible; a simple ‘string on the nipple’ method with a balloon on each end. Upsides are that this method will certainly keep you perky. but downsides include having two balloons sticking out from your shirt looks ridiculous and if you use helium balloons, there’s the possibility you could end up with a charge of public indecency (not to mention rope burns on your areolas).

  1. Boob push ups

A while back a woman became an internet sensation when she made her boobs dance, so why not have them perform push ups? Sure it might take a lot of squeezing and flexing but if achieved, it could start a new exercise sensation.

  1. Hire a man (or woman)!

This is a more effective and intimate solution, but still an idea. Hiring someone might seem like a possibility open to those who are well-to-do and can afford to have a servant for such a menial task, but in reality it’s a job which, if available, would certainly do something to reduce the unemployment rate, particularly among the male and lesbian population!

  1. A boob shelf

A simple bit of carpentry might be the answer to the prayers of the boobylicious. A 2×4 hung around the neck by a string makes for a good sagging deterrent and, if necessary, somewhere to hang your cereal when eating breakfast! Beware of splinters!

  1. Insomnia

Certainly an extreme idea, but since boobs flop around when women sleep, no position is a plus when trying to stop this. Plus it’s a good way of stopping them from falling into your armpits when sleeping on your back.

  1. Wear a bra – always

Yes, the thing which is supposed to keep your breasts in place is probably the best idea, only all the time. It’s widely known among women that their best feeling of the day is when they can finally unhook their ‘over shoulder boulder holder’ and let the ‘girls’ roam free, but doing so contributes to sagging. Find a comfortable bra and keeping it on is a plus.

  1. Avoid bouncy exercise.

Keeping fit is a must for most people today, but if you have boobs it just might be dangerous. All that bouncing up and down while performing activities like running, getting on a trampoline, or jumping in any way not only might damage a few ligaments, it might also cause damage in other places. Injuries include (if you’re particularly stacked) black eyes, nipple chafing and bruising passers-by if they get too close!

  1. Keep your hands above your head at all times

Certainly this idea will make your cleavage and boobs look a lot perkier, especially in a low cut top, and give your arms a much needed workout. A good deodorant is a must when trying out this method!

  1. Massage your boobs with a feather

Our last method is probably our most bonkers. Indeed there’s no scientific proof that this will actually make your boobs perkier, but some sites say that they will get bigger. They’ll certainly be more ticklish, which is why it should probably be confined to the bedroom with your partner




Learn how to let go….

 

 

“To let go does not mean to get rid of. To let go means to let be. When we let be with compassion, things come and go on their own.” –Jack Kornfield

Holding on to pain doesn’t fix anything. Replaying the past over and over again doesn’t change it, and wishing things were different doesn’t make it so. In some cases, especially when it comes to the past, all you can do is accept whatever it is you’re holding on to and then let it go. That’s how everything changes. You have to let go of what is hurting you, even if it feels almost impossible. Deciding to hold on to the past will hold you back from creating a strong sense of self — a self that isn’t defined by your past, but rather by who you want to be. Oddly enough, painful feelings can be comfortable, especially if they’re all you know. Some people have trouble letting go of their pain or other unpleasant emotions about their past, because they think those feelings are part of their identity. In some ways, they may not know who they are without their pain. This makes it impossible for them to let go.

If you find it hard to let go of the past, a bad relationship, grudges, etc., these 12 tips could help:

1. Understand that the relationships you thought you’d have are going to be different than the ones you actually have.

We must accept the person we are in this moment, and the way other people are, too. As time goes on, we continue to learn that things don’t always go as planned — actually, they pretty much never do. And that’s okay: If you become aware of yourself and your part of your relationships, they will improve; however, you may also have to accept facts about certain people in your life. Practice gratitude, appreciation, and trust in the process.

2. Don’t be invested in the outcome when it comes to dealing with people, because it often leads to disappointment.

Expectations have a way of keeping us stuck, because they lead us to fear certain outcomes. There are no guarantees in life, and there’s nothing we can really do to get the outcomes we desire when dealing with others. When our expectations or needs aren’t met, we need to respond rationally and appropriately. Sometimes this means setting respectful boundaries; other times, it means letting go.

3. Don’t live in chains when you have the key. We live with self-limiting beliefs that we let define who we are.

We think, “I could never do that!” or “I could never make that happen!” If you truly believe that, you’ll never accomplish your goals. Open up your mind, and believe in yourself. There will be many people who tell you that you can’t do it. It’s up to you to prove them wrong.

4. Let go of the idea that you can control others’ actions. We really only have control over ourselves and how we act.

You can’t change another person, so don’t waste your time and energy trying. I think this is the biggest factor that pushes people to hold onto unhelpful behaviors, like the need to please. We think, “If only I do everything for everyone, they’ll never get mad at me.” Wrong!

5. Only worry about what you think of yourself.

Free yourself from being controlled by what other people think. Start to prioritize how you feel about yourself. As Mahatma Gandhi said, “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” You can’t live by your values if you’re living for the approval of others.

6. Leave room for mistakes.

Did you make a mistake or say something stupid? It’s okay! Use the experience to learn and make a joke. It doesn’t make you stupid to say something wrong or silly: it makes you human, and sometimes even funny.

7. Accept the things you cannot change.

Stop wishing things could be the way they once were. Bring yourself into the present moment. This is where life happens. You can’t change the past; you can only make decisions today to help how your future turns out.
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8. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

This will allow you to relax and enjoy life’s journey. I laugh with myself and at myself all the time.

9. Do what scares you.

Fear holds us back from doing a lot of things, because it closes our minds to possibilities for our future and locks us into our comfort zone. Most fears fill us with doubt and “what ifs” that imprison us. The more you do to get out of your comfort zone, the more fear will subside. In life, do what scares you, and you’ll grow and succeed!

10. Express what works for you.

Find your voice, and share with others what you’re thinking and feeling in a rational way. If you continue to communicate with others what works for you and doesn’t work for you, you’ll no longer bottle up your emotions. Expressing yourself is an important part of feeling good about yourself and your relationships.

11. Allow yourself to feel negative emotions.

Whether you lost a loved one through death or a break-up, honor your loss. Trying to ignore your negative emotions will extend your suffering. Loss is difficult to experience, and it’s okay to allow yourself to hurt and be sad. Let yourself feel, and go through the grief process so that you can move forward.
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12. Learn forgiveness.

Resentment and unwillingness to forgive will keep you locked in the past and prevent you from moving forward with your life. Remember: When you forgive, you aren’t doing it for the other person; you’re doing it for yourself. If for no other reason than that, forgive and let go.

Carl Jung said, “I am not what happened to me, I am what I choose to become.” There’s a lesson in that for all of us: Try to let go of whatever it is that’s holding you back from experiencing yourself. You’ll probably realize that you are not what other people say you are. You are not your pain, your past, or your emotions. It’s the negative ideas about ourselves and our hurtful self-talk that get in the way of who we really want to be. Being able to let go requires a strong sense of self, which gives you the ability to learn and grow from your experiences.”

 

psychologytoday.com




Why men secretly go for curvy women

 

 

 

I’m not skinny, but I used to be very skinny. When I quit smoking I gained about fifty pounds. At first, I was pretty horrified about it. My boyfriend at the time told me he preferred it when I was skinny, but after the relationship ended and I learned to love my smokeless, overweight body, I had a few different ideas about it.

The thing that changed my mind about missing the skinny me was all the men that were hitting on me. I was getting flirted with left and right! It was nice. I was a little shocked about it, but I finally got a man to fess up and tell me why he liked my curves. Why do men like curvy women you ask? Here’s what I’ve learnt.

1. Bigger boobs

There are many men who are “boob” men and curvy women have bigger boobs. It’s that simple. They don’t mind the few extra inches around the middle as long as they get to play with the goods. Make note here, ladies, use those boobs to your advantage!

2. More booty

In the history of rock and roll, there has never been a song about a flat butt. Ever. My butt was pretty cute when I was thin, but it really grew and rounded out when I put on a few pounds. I thought for sure it was going to make men move along to the next girl, but I was wrong. In fact, I got more compliments on my bigger butt than I did on my tiny perky butt. Although I miss my perky little rear, I do like the compliments.

3. They’re softer

Curvy women are softer and men like to be the strong, hard ones in a relationship. It’s more satisfying for a guy to curl up and snuggle someone soft and round, than it is to snuggle up to bones and sharp elbows, so I’ve been told.

4. No bruised thighs

I prefer men with weight for one main reason: I hate having bruised thighs after sleeping with a man. A skinny guy leaves my sensitive body bruised and sore, but a softer body isn’t as hard on my thighs. I’ve been told that sentiment works both ways.

5. They eat

Men do not want to be the only ones eating when they go out, it’s weird for them. If you’re sitting there nibbling a salad and you finish an hour before he’s done with his steak and potatoes, he gets pretty nervous about it. Men like curvy women because they eat with them and it’s always more comfortable to eat with someone than to have someone sit and watch you eat.

6. They look younger

Men also like curvy women because, generally, they look younger. It’s true, that extra fat smooth’s out those wrinkles, ladies! I got told the other day I looked twenty five. I’m thirty seven. My round cheeks play a big role in looking younger.

7. It’s a sign of fertility

Another one of the main reasons men like curvy women is actually biological and subconscious. Men associate wide hips and large breasts with fertility, they always have. A woman with curves was said to be good for child bearing and men associate curves with that notion. Even if they aren’t ready to have children, the fact that you look fertile makes them want to mate with you.

8. They’re not afraid to get a little rough

I had a guy tell me once that he was afraid of hurting me. He would rather put me on a shelf like a little china doll and not touch me. That was when I was skinny. I’ve never had that problem with my curves, in fact, most of my boyfriends haven’t been afraid to ask for something a little harder or kinkier in the bedroom. I guess they think a curvy girl can handle it.

9. It’s classic beauty

All of the old, classic statues and paintings had women with curves. From ancient Greece to the Renaissance, women who had large, cellulite thighs and chubby arms were considered beautiful. There are a few reasons for this. Aside from the “fertility” idea (which we’ve already discussed), women who are curvy are known to be well fed.

Food is a sign of health. Food is also a sign of wealth (being able to buy food and all). It has been proven that during times of economic depression or repression more men preferred curvy women, because in their mind, they associate it with health and wealth.

10. It’s less “boyish” and less “child-like”

I have known men to be genuinely turned off by skinny women because it is a sign of immaturity to them. Many men associate curves with the “mother” figure and a more mature woman, so dating a skinny woman doesn’t appeal to them. Also, some guys feel like dating a skinny woman is too much like dating another guy, they don’t like the way it feels.

While there are some men who do prefer thin women (I’ve been turned down by a few, believe me), there are still many men who prefer women with curves and extra weight. Italian men and Greek men are excellent examples of guys who like they’re women a little on the rounder side. I’ve met guys who like their women a LOT on the rounder side!

The point is, no matter what your weight is, there is always someone out there who finds it attractive. Honestly.

So, instead of worrying about needing to lose weight (or worrying about needing to gain weight), appreciate your body as it is.

If you’re a woman with a few extra pounds, don’t hide your figure, go out and flaunt it! Don’t you want to show off those curves?

Rachel




How to get your mojo back – Get rid of your stress

Stress is a funny emotion; it stops us from thinking of new ideas or solutions and causes us to feel rather ordinary. Stress and worry blocks happiness, creativity and living life to the max.
I remember there was a time in my life for a period of about 2 years in which I lost my routine and passion for my life. I stopped exercising, I stacked on 10kg, was struggling with some emotional issues and it was the unhappiest time of my life to date. I was tense and stressing about everything. This was a first for me, for I am a very positive person and have been a keen exerciser my whole life. During this time however, exercise seemed like a chore, I was so exhausted all the time and I worried that I would feel more tired if I exercised. I also thought “what’s the point?” Apart from work I had no routine and nothing inspired me.
Then my therapist/energy healer, suggested I take up Salsa dancing to boost my “feminine energy” and believed it would be of benefit to me. She recommended a dance school, I contacted them and started Zouk classes- a Brazilian style of dance. At first I was quite stiff and worried about the steps a lot, my shoulders were tight and I was looking down trying to do perfect steps. However, the teacher, Alex, did me a big favour and reminded me loosen up, to let go of trying to get it perfect and instead give in to the dance and to dance with my heart and soul. I realised in class, that the way I was dancing Zouk was the way I was dancing in my life – stiff and trying to control everything, which is an impossible feat. Sometimes, we all need reminding, and Zouk was that for me, to let go, smile and embrace life again!
As I started to give in to the dance, I was connecting with me again, I found myself smiling with my heart and soul, trusting in me and it felt so good. I started going with the flow more in my own life, and trusting in the process without getting attached to a particular outcome.  As a result, it sparked my passion for running and gym (I even joined a gym on an 18 month contract – commitment?!), I’m feeling more creative with my work and positive about my future.
Inspiration and new ideas only come when the mind is clear and relaxed. The stress I was feeling previously blocked out all the good that I’m experiencing now.
I also learnt when you trust, let go and embrace life, something ignites inside of you that money can’t buy; others will want a piece and ask you how to get it and you simply say, “I let go of trying to control everything, I chose happiness.” Because when you do, more good things will come, like a beautiful ripple effect.
I recommend any style of dance for both men and women, it’s a way to connect with who you are and iron out the stiffness and stress that you may be holding onto. Is it time to let go?
Stay happy and healthy,
Eleni



Avoid Romance Scams in the Cyber Love Age

Valentine’s Day has only just gone. The one day of the year when schmaltzy dedications of love are not only not frowned upon but actively encouraged. Not everyone is lucky in love though and, in the eternal quest to find Mr or Miss Right hides a sinister online world where the vulnerable and lovelorn can get very easily burned.

There was a time, long in the past, where the local singletons would go down to the disco or local dance in order to find that special someone; those days are definitely gone. The most popular way these days to find love is online, which has seen a surge with applications such as Tinder and Plenty of Fish, now offering instant, on-the-move match-making. Online provides a way for those unable to cultivate a social life, for work or personal reasons, to find instant gratification, although it does have its pitfalls.

The main problem with online is simple; you just never know to whom you’re talking. Of course, the picture may say that you’re talking to a Kelly Brook lookalike or someone who makes Jamie Dornan look like a minger, but if you’ve not actually seen the person in the flesh it’s difficult to tell. Here’s a quick guide on the how dating scammers work and how to stay safe.

  1. Dating scammers are devious. Their usual modus operandi starts off with the profile. The pictures are more often than not plucked off some website which features the most beautiful people. Sometimes they’ll even take pictures of actual celebrities and pass it off as themselves, relying on their intended target to not be media savvy and recognise their picture as a complete fake (this might sound stupid but there are people out there just that naïve unfortunately). A great site is tineye.com where, if you save the persons picture, you can them upload it to see if it’s anywhere else online.

 

  1. They’ll tailor their ‘interests’ to suit the target. These people know that they want to target the bored, lonely and easily fooled who may not get out much, so they’ll use interests which could be considered the type of things that lonely single people may do i.e. watch TV, read. In other words, interests for one.

 

  1. They’ll start showering you with charming words and compliments, sometimes within days of their first message, using ‘baby’ and ‘darling’ and wanting to stray away from the dating site and talk in a more ‘personal’ setting i.e. Whatsapp or giving you a phone number to call, and even laughing at your jokes (when in fact they’re really laughing at you). A simple trick is finding out early if you’re being conned is, if they claim to be from an English-speaking country yet use strangely-broken English in their typed conversations, then it’s safe to assume you’re being had. If you suspect this, ask for a voicemail and if they refuse – delete their profile and number.

 

  1. After a while of talking, it’s time for them to drop the boom. You’ll get frantic email/text/call claiming that your beloved is in financial trouble, getting hassled by an ex or family member, or is having a legal issue and needs money to help them out. They may even ask for you to give your bank details. Needless to say, get rid of the rose-tinted glasses and get rid of the number. They may became more insistent should you initially refuse, using phrases like ‘I thought you loved me’ or ‘I thought we were friends’ to elicit a guilt. Don’t give into it!

It goes without saying that some online romances are actually genuine, I know of one couple who met online and are happily married these past five years, but being aware of the pitfalls never does any harm because not everyone is just that nice. so, if you’re a sexy singleton this Valentine’s Day don’t be put off going out; put down the tub of Haagen –Dazs, turn off Bridget Jones’ Diary or the football. Get on the glad-rags to find the love of your life – preferably




Spring is coming – Build up your abs

Spring is here, or nearly here, however you chose to see things.
Myself I have decided to ditch the winter clothes, and venture out in my white jeans and pretty brightly coloured tops. I must say it is still a tad cold, so I invested in a lilac fur trimmed faux leather biker jacket, keeping warm but still with the element of spring.
Ripped jeans are a big fashion piece for 2017, I myself love them, they go great with flat pumps, or stroppy heels, I can’t get enough
As we can see many celebs are loving them too, teaming them up with thin jumpers, or dressy belly tops.
This brings me to my recent discovery in the gym.
With all these fab high waisted ripped jeans and belly tops, I want to be summer body ready.
Great abs have always been in style, but I find this to be the area I find the easiest to work out.
So I rejoined the gym and enlisted the help of a trainer, for advice mainly (trainers can be very pricey, just try to get the basics and go it alone, or with a friend) he showed me the decline sit ups, where your head is further down the elevated work bench, and you sit up to be upright, with or without a weight plate (the weight plate really boosted my workout)
I have found these to be the most effective of techniques I have ever tried.
Being a mum, many of us share this same problem area, and the singer Kelly Clarkson, I really felt for recently had came under the dreaded Katie Hopkins wrath, for her weight gain after pregnancy.
Hopkins made (fat jibes) at the new mum on Twitter, in very poor taste I think.
When woman attacking one another for responding differently to pregnancy absolutely disgusts me. If Hopkins had of found her weight an issue she would never of poked fun at others, completely showing her lack of intelligence.
I mean come on, it’s like poking fun at a blonde because you’re a brunette! Absolutely pointless and pathetic, just like her.
She pokes fun at “talentless” people trying to gain fame, when she herself gets attention from bullying others! Madness she is even given air time.
Well that will be the only time I will give her any attention.
Any of you embarking on a new fitness plan for this summer, I salute you, and wish you all the luck. And remember, a good clean healthy diet is 80% of the battle.
Kisses Holly

So I rejoined the gym and enlisted the help of a trainer, for advice mainly
(trainers can be very pricey, just try to get the basics and go it alone,
or with a friend) he showed me the  decline sit ups, where your head is
further down the elevated work bench, and you sit up to be upright, with or
without a weight plate (the weight plate really boosted my workout)
I have found these to be the most effective of techniques I have ever
tried.

Being a mum, many of us share this same problem area, and the singer Kelly
Clarkson, I really felt for recently had came under the dreaded Katie
Hopkins wrath, for her weight gain after pregnancy.

Hopkins made (fat jibes) at the new mum on Twitter, in very poor taste I
think.
When woman attacking one another for responding differently to pregnancy
absolutely disgusts me. If Hopkins had of found her weight an issue she
would never of poked fun at others, completely showing her lack of
intelligence.
I mean come on, it’s like poking fun at a blonde because you’re a brunette!
Absolutely pointless and pathetic, just like  her.
She pokes fun at “talentless” people trying to gain fame, when she herself
gets attention from bullying others! Madness she is even given air time.
Well that will be the only time I will give her any attention.

Any of you embarking on a new fitness plan for this summer, I salute you,
and wish you all the luck. And remember, a good clean healthy diet is 80%
of the battle.

Kisses Holly




Vindictive people – It is all mums fault

What makes people so vindictive and so willing to hurt others, especially those that have a connection with one another such as children? Do you get a thrill of knowing you know how to push just the right buttons to cause emotional pain to that person?

You have situations such as couples having a child together, all the family members and friends get along to some degree and things are going great. Then *bam* everything starts to fall apart and the couple is no longer a couple. Uh oh, what happens now?

Well, it’s definitely not the parents sit down as adults and work out how to raise their child and who does what when and how. No no, the father of the child has to bring up something that happened years ago that the mother did and clearly never forgave her for and starts to tell everyone how unfit she is to raise the child. The father then starts trying to take steps to cut the mother out of the child’s life, but also telling the mother of the child that he would do everything possible to make sure she gets to spend time with their child even though they aren’t together. Mixed signals much? Lets make matters even worse and now throw in the family members of the father of the child. Since the couple is no longer a couple then *hey* who cares about the mother of the child. You’re no longer with our son so we’ll just help try and keep our grandchild away from you.

Seriously are these people not thinking of the child? Is all that goes through their mind is how best to hurt the mother?

What about married couples that have children and things fall apart?

Sadly you get the same thing and sometimes even worse! Mothers that use their children as weapons to hurt the father by turning the child against their dad. They’ll tell them things like your dad doesn’t love us or want you and that’s why he left or you’re dad’s a bum and we don’t need him.

There’s cases where you see joint custody with the parents and the grandparents for whatever reasons, best interest of the parties involved at the time of the family dynamics falling apart that also can turn ugly. Life moves on, the parents mature and grow in their new situations and it’s time to explore outside of everyone’s comfort zone. *whoops* the grandparents don’t like this idea very much and start making up lies and twisting facts to try and prevent this from occurring.

Again I ask do the vindictive ones not stop and think of what harm they are causing? Do they really not care? Is it really all about them?




The Real Meaning of Easter

The best way to understand the real meaning of Easter would be from Jesus. The real meaning is a three word answer … the new covenant.

The New Covenant

Jesus had come in town for the Passover celebratrion and was getting ready to be betrayed by one of the disciples, publicly humiliated and mocked, beaten beyond recognition, and hung on a cross to die, when he made his special request for his followers to remember that He gave his body for us and poured out his blood as a sacrifice for us. The heart of Easter lies in his words, “the new covenant between God and his people.”

In Luke 22 we get a picture of the night before his death:

When the time came, Jesus and the apostles sat down together at the table. Jesus said, “I have been very eager to eat this Passover meal with you before my suffering begins. For I tell you now that I won’t eat this meal again until its meaning is fulfilled in the Kingdom of God.” Then he took a cup of wine and gave thanks to God for it. Then he said, “Take this and share it among yourselves. For I will not drink wine again until the Kingdom of God has come.” He took some bread and gave thanks to God for it. Then he broke it in pieces and gave it to the disciples, saying, “This is my body, which is given for you. Do this to remember me.” After supper he took another cup of wine and said, “This cup is the new covenant between God and his people—an agreement confirmed with my blood, which is poured out as a sacrifice for you. Luke 22:14-20

Passover and the New Covenant

Since the fall of mankind in the Garden of Eden, people were destined to be separated from God because of their sin. God’s Spirit rested on the Patriarchs of our faith, but was not poured out on the masses. The Holy of Holies was the innermost and most sacred part of the tablernacle and ordinary people of faith would never get to have access to this place where God’s Presence could be found. We were hopeless in our sins and distanced from God.

People of faith offered up animal sacrifices according to the laws given to Moses to ask God to forgive their sins and have mercy on them. Bulls, goats, and lambs each had their significance. But the lamb had special meaning because it was lamb’s blood the Israelites painted on their doorposts to avoid death on the night of Passover. (Exodus 12:11-13)

God gave Moses and Aaron specific instructions on how to honor God with annual Passover celebrations. Lamb is the pinnacle of the Passover meal. The lambs were to be spotless and even lived with the families for several days before they were sacrificed, adding to the understanding that the ultimate sacrifice was close to the hearts of those whose sins were atoned for. All of the many interesting details of celebrating Passover have significant meaning that point to the ultimate Passover lamb – Jesus Christ – a sinless God-man who lived among the people for a season.

What is the real meaning of Easter? In John 1:29, as he sees Jesus approaching, John the Baptist announces to the crowd around him, “Look! The Lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world!”

He knew that Jesus was the son of God, the long awaited Messiah, the one whom God’s prophets had promised to save mankind from their sins and to give them a deep heartfelt relationship with God the Father. The new covenant would be an everlasting covenant. (Jeremiah 31:31-34, Jeremiah 32:39-42, Isaiah 55:3) Jesus, our sacrificial lamb, our Savior, our God, our Redeemer – he laid down his life as our sacrificial lamb to pay for our sins. When he rose from the dead three days later, he gave victory over eternal separation from God (death) to all who put their faith and trust in him. That is the new covenant – everlasting life spent with God through faith in all that Jesus Christ has done and continues to do.

Bible Verses

All who believe in the Son of God know in their hearts that this testimony is true. Those who don’t believe this are actually calling God a liar because they don’t believe what God has testified about his Son. And this is what God has testified: He has given us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. Whoever has the Son has life; whoever does not have God’s Son does not have life. (1 John 5:10-12, NLT)

“Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, and that He was buried, and that He rose again the third day according to the Scriptures” (1 Corinthians 15:3b-4, KJV)

“If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.” (Romans 10:9, NLT)

Prayer

Father God, there is sometimes controversy about how, when, and what to call the remembrance of the greatest day in history – the day Jesus Christ, your beloved son, rose from the dead and brought the gift of your forgiveness and eternal life to all who would like to receive it – the new covenant. Please pour out your Holy Spirit on all who believe in the resurrection of Jesus Christ and put us on our knees before you with thankful hearts for your great love for us. You, oh God, have given us victory over sin and death, and the promise of never leaving us or forsaking us for eternity. Help us to be the body of Christ, the church, united in awe of how you saved our unworthy souls … your body and your blood as a sacrifice for us. Help us to bring this message to all who will listen. Help us to love like you love. Thank you forever! Amen.